I'm currently dating a guy and we kiss and hug..what sin am I supposed to confess to my father of confession about this issue? I don't think it's adultery since there are no sexual things going on bw us.
It's not necessarily any sin at all. But it is wise and profitable to tell your father of confession about such questions and about such relationships so that he can give you advice and counsel which will help you avoid sin. He is best placed to guide you in these things since he knows you and your situation better than we can or should.
In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit
Forgive me, I disagree with peterfarrington
I think that it is a sin ( I am not judging, I am just saying what I know is right)
1- Our Lord said, "But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart" Mathew 5:28
2- God says, "You shall not covet your neighbor's house. You shall not covet your neighbor's wife, or his manservant or maidservant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor" (Exodus 20:17).
I know that I am the last one who can give an advise but I like what peterfarrington
But it is wise and profitable to tell your father of confession about such questions and about such relationships so that he can give you advice and counsel which will help you avoid sin
I think that talking to you FOC is the best thing to do just explain your situation and God will talk through him. God loves us and He accepts us
this is one of those topics that get my mind to die.....for example
-when you get married and you decide to have a baby, is there a christian way to have a baby also? and do you even have to confess, because in the bible it does say to be fruitful and multiply. Correct me if i am wrong.
-But it depends on how old you are because according to church "dogma" you have to be in a certain age to actually go out and date, and i dont even think your allowed to kiss!
As Fr.Peter said, its best to take it to your FOC. As we know, there are a lot of things out there not not expressly classified by Scripture as sinful. Some of these could be rather trivial day to day acts. Even seemingly harmless acts such as handshakes or watching TV, certain ads or surfing the net are known to lead to and provoke passions of the wrong kind and then onto something more serious.
As with most things around us - they could either be a stepping stone or a stumbling block with a very fine line dividing the two.Ask yourself if what you do is appropriate and brings glory to God.
I think that we must be careful not to be so quick to judge one another.
To hug or even kiss someone might well be sin, and such relationships should always be brought before the persons father of confession.
But we must not accuse people of adultery, or of coveting someones wife, when this is not the case. For two young people to kiss is dangerous and should be avoided. But we must not leap to accusations of adultery. All of these questions are better brought before a father of confession rather than exposed on an internet forum.
John 8:3-11 The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group and said to Jesus, "Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?" They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him. But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, "If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her." Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground. At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. Jesus straightened up and asked her, "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?" "No one, sir," she said. "Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin."
Let us avoid throwing stones. Often when we see sin in other's behaviour we are rather transferring the passions which overwhelm us onto them. We should be slow to accuse others of sinful behaviour and quick to accuse ourselves.
When we say 'I am not judging, I know what is right' then we cannot avoid judging. We do not know the hearts of other people. We have enough trouble understanding our own. It is surely enough to say 'Be careful, these things can lead to sin'. The greatest of all the virtues is humility, and this requires us to have a keen sense of our own sin and to be blind to the sin of others. We will never be wrong if we urge brothers and sisters to speak to their own father of confession.
[quote author=FRA link=topic=7688.msg100617#msg100617 date=1235945330] I'm currently dating a guy and we kiss and hug..what sin am I supposed to confess to my father of confession about this issue? I don't think it's adultery since there are no sexual things going on bw us.
Hi FRA,
Does your conscience tell you that you've done something wrong?
Saint Isaac the Syrian said : First stop talking to give your heart a chance to talk, and then stop your heart from talking so you can give your ears a chance to listen to God.
I think if your conscience is disrupted in ANYWAY - you should not ignore this.
If i were in your shoes, I would tell Abouna what your conscience is telling you. Often, we ignore what our conscience tells us because we ligitimise and justify our acts by saying "well, I'm still a virgin, so doing everything except sex is OK"
This is disasterous.
You actually have much to gain by listening to your conscience - and I'm talking about the relationship with this young man. You'll end up with much more than your bargained for if you follow what your conscience is telling you.
I would stress the utmost in telling your FoC who should be a specialist in the conscience!!
If he's not, then my advice is as follows:
a) If your conscience is disturbing you that you've done something wrong, yet you don't know what it is, then stop doing whatever you are doing until you understand COMPLETELY what is wrong with it. And the understanding will come around by fasting and prayer, and giving yourself a chance to listen to God's words.
b) If your conscience is TOTALLY ok with what you are doing, then great - live by God's commandments that says "Walk in the light" - whatever you do, do it in the open. Tell your parents, tell his parents, be as OPEN about it as you possibly can. The reaction from your parents and his parents should signal whether you are doing something wrong.
Finally, if I had a daughter, I'd find the guy that kissed her and break his neck. Then I'd find out who his parents are and if I found out they were COPTIC!!! then i'd kick them so hard they'd regret even giving birth to a son. But everyone's different. For me, I'd be so furious that my daughter was in a relationship with a guy that didnt even present himself to me, and it was in the dark. If that was their level of spirituality, then frankly speaking, there's no point in marrying someone coptic. If you are Coptic because you love holiness, then this has nothing in common with holiness and you are just fooling yourself.
Going out for a coffee, with friends, even alone - that's fine. But hugging, kissing, etc... I'd be mad because my daughter will be getting attached to a guy who isnt virtuous enough to have bothered to introduce himself and is doing things in the dark. That would just make me mad.
Thanks peterfarrington for correcting me ( God bless you)
I just wanted to say that I did not mean to judge anyone. I wanted to judge the situation
Because that is what I believe in. I know that God is with us at all times. If we can see Him with our eyes, can someone kiss his girlfriend in front of God.
I like this verse," Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart." 2 Timothy 2:22
We do not know the hearts of other people. We have enough trouble understanding our own. It is surely enough to say 'Be careful, these things can lead to sin'
Sorry for posting with a question rather than an answer, but is it important to name a sin?
I've never really explored the question, so you may be on a very good line of thought.
I define sin as any act or intention that is not in accordance with God's will. As such, the only actions and intentions that really need signposts are the ones that point us in the right direction (love, prayer, hinesty, preserverence, etc.). Any other labels are of lower importance; they more or less tell us where it is very important not to go, and they are only useful if we intend to take detours. I realize my definition has a hole in it. Maybe I'll open a discussion about that sometime, but those details don't seem relevant here.
Also, (and Fr Peter, please confirm or correct this) confession isn't telling your FoC a list of sins, it's a healthy conversation and a means of letting go of the things that pull you off course. The things that you confess don't need to be sins at all. It could be in reference to a situation you got yourself into in the best of intentions, or the results of someone else's actions that hurt your faith in some way.
Yes, confession is much more than merely listing sins. Indeed the usefulness of the sacrament is barely reached by simply doing that. One could imagine a confession that had no list of sins at all, just a narrative description of how a person was proceeding with their spiritual life based on previous conversations. This would itself root out issues which needed confronting.
Surely sin should be understood as that which prevents us drawing closer to God, which must be the aim of the spiritual life. In that sense we should not focus on sin at all, other than in seeking to remove obstacles to knowing God better. In a conversation with our spiritual fathers we should then find benefit in discussing what we find hard, rather than seeing things in black and white, and in terms of failure and success.
Perhaps I am finding it hard to read some of the Scripture each day. We don't need to find a name for this problem before we describe it. Our spiritual father will help us to see where the problem lies. Is it laziness? Is it because we are allowing worries to take away our sense of peace? Is it just because we don't have a version of the Bible we can understand easily? Our spiritual father will help us to uncover the real reasons. Naming it as the sin of not reading the Bible tends to reduce our spiritual lives to a list of things we have to do. This is far from the reality of our Orthodox Christian life.
If we are honest with our spiritual fathers then they can help us to grow up in Christ, which is a part of their ministry. It demands a relationship with a person, not adherence to a list of rules. The rules are there to be applied by our spiritual fathers as they see fit in our particular circumstances. When we try to apply them ourselves, or worse, when we try to apply them to others, then we generally tend to end up making all manner of mistakes. Perhaps one person is encouraged to fast to a particular time of day and perhaps another is instructed to break their fast later or earlier. If we just have a list of rules then we will often say that so-and-so is slack or lacks commitment because we only see the outward appearance. Yet the spiritual father sees the heart and knows how to apply the spiritual medicine of the Church. The medicine that heals one person in one situation might cause harm to another. Which is why it is best left to a persons spiritual father.
It is clear from the forums here that many Coptic youth face many of the same issues which tend to reflect the interaction of the Coptic culture with the modern Western and secular one. It is encouraging to see so many with a desire for holiness, and others who wish to address imbalances and mistakes which they have made or are making. My only concern is that many of these issues are best addressed in the relationship of a person with their spiritual father, and that when the question is asked publically - is this a sin? - it seems to me that any and every answer is wrong in some sense. Either we condemn one who should not be condemned, or we condone the actions of someone who should not be condoned. This is where the spiritual father knows best. He can ask the questions which should not be asked here. He can see the body language of his spiritual child. He already knows the person.
This is not to say that the questions should not be asked here, but to counsel a certain hesitancy in making blanket statements. And to suggest that listing sins is not a profitable way forward for any of us. Those sins which we miss are often the most damaging to us. The pride, the anger, the selfishness, the selfcentredness. It is relatively easy to not drink, not smoke, not hang out with girls/boys, be in Church a lot, even know lots of hymns. But our spiritual fathers help us go beyond all the good things we do and the bad things we avoid and discover the real issues in our lives. A lot of that is invisible on the internet, where sometimes those who do bad things and stupid things are perhaps more aware of their sin, more humble, less proud, even closer to God.
I don not think this is a sin because it doesn't say it in black ink in the bible "THOU SHALL NOT KISS SOMEONE." or like "THOU SHALL NOT DATE." I think the best verse for this is [glow=red,2,300]"All things are lawful for me, but not all things are helpful; all things are lawful for me, but not all things edify."[/glow] so ask yourself how is dating helpful for me? what am I gaining from this relationship?
I think it's not a sin in itself but it's a road to sin..i don't know..this is my own conclusion about it. Any other views are welcome to reply to my question.
[quote author=FRA link=topic=7688.msg100662#msg100662 date=1236030402] I think it's not a sin in itself but it's a road to sin..i don't know..this is my own conclusion about it. Any other views are welcome to reply to my question.
That's brilliant. I really love your conclusion. Now that you know it is the road to sin, how do u get off it?
What can you do in your power to change it into a road to righteousness and integrity?
If u know that it is the road to sin, and you do not act on this, that will lead to 2 sins:
a) The sin itself (which is most likely lust) b) The sin of pride (where you deceive yourself in thinking that you are above being tempted to even sin.
I still think the focus ought to be on what a person should be doing rather than avoiding what they shouldn't do.
Perhaps a simpler illustration of what I mean is the difference between telling the truth, not telling the truth, and lying. Everyone knows we shouldn't lie, but many of us think it's ok to intentionally leave out key bits of truth because "it wasn't a lie (exactly)".
I think the answer here will come from answering the question "What should you do?", rather than "What should you not do?".
I'm pretty sure you're not kissing this guy because you don't care about him. So could the right answer possibly be to figure out how to get away from him? (I kind of doubt it) I think the question to ask is, "what are the right things to do to love him properly?". Should you love him as a brother, or a future husband? In either case, abstinence is a good idea.
People, she's not asking whether or not it is wrong... I think she already thinks it is wrong. [quote author=FRA link=topic=7688.msg100653#msg100653 date=1236017748] I still don't understand...what sin is this called if it is a sin?
The sin? It's called lust.
[quote author=FRA link=topic=7688.msg100662#msg100662 date=1236030402] I think it's not a sin in itself but it's a road to sin..i don't know..this is my own conclusion about it. Any other views are welcome to reply to my question.
Contrary to what most people may think... there's little gray in the Bible. That's my opinion anyway. Sure there are discussions that can go on forever with no conclusion. But for the most part, it's rather simple... black and white. Road to sin? Roads to sin are just as much sin as the sin the road leads to.
Finally I'd like to say one thing... Christianity is not about doing no wrong - that's the Jewish law that was ... renewed by Jesus Christ. Now, it's more about doing good.
Romans 12:21 - Do not be overcome with evil, but overcome evil with good.
So, rather than trying to figure out if something is bad... ask yourself if it is good.
[quote author=INRI link=topic=7688.msg100862#msg100862 date=1236591153] QT - careful about the conscience thing... Conscience can be quite adaptive.
Yes, it can!!!! You are so right.
But, I stressed that we should be careful in not hushing out what our consciences are telling us. We should listen very carefully. As you can see from thread, the poster's comments indicate that there IS in fact something on her conscience.
I am therefore stressing that she should not brush it off as a malfunction of her being, but rather listen to it, and deal with it through spiritual councelling with her FoC to see what is bothering it.
She should be praised even for raising that she feels that this is a sin. This is quite rare. Don't u think??
Who nowadays would commit a sin like fornication (as an example!) - and turn and say "I feel that my conscience is telling me that what i have done is wrong"????
And as you said, people's conscioussses are highly adaptive. They are selective in what they feel bad about. In fact, I don't believe that they feel "bad" about anything.. they only feel bad when their soul gets hurt of offended by the actions of sinful behaviour.
I'm glad we are fasting: it truley teaches us that although I can eat everything, not everything is beneficial for me.
Comments
God bless your desire for holiness
Father Peter
Forgive me, I disagree with peterfarrington
I think that it is a sin ( I am not judging, I am just saying what I know is right)
1- Our Lord said, "But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart" Mathew 5:28
2- God says, "You shall not covet your neighbor's house. You shall not covet your neighbor's wife, or his manservant or maidservant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor" (Exodus 20:17).
I know that I am the last one who can give an advise but I like what peterfarrington I think that talking to you FOC is the best thing to do just explain your situation and God will talk through him. God loves us and He accepts us
Pray for our weakness
-when you get married and you decide to have a baby, is there a christian way to have a baby also? and do you even have to confess, because in the bible it does say to be fruitful and multiply. Correct me if i am wrong.
-But it depends on how old you are because according to church "dogma" you have to be in a certain age to actually go out and date, and i dont even think your allowed to kiss!
As with most things around us - they could either be a stepping stone or a stumbling block with a very fine line dividing the two.Ask yourself if what you do is appropriate and brings glory to God.
God bless,
Paulos
To hug or even kiss someone might well be sin, and such relationships should always be brought before the persons father of confession.
But we must not accuse people of adultery, or of coveting someones wife, when this is not the case. For two young people to kiss is dangerous and should be avoided. But we must not leap to accusations of adultery. All of these questions are better brought before a father of confession rather than exposed on an internet forum.
John 8:3-11 The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group and said to Jesus, "Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?" They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him. But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, "If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her." Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground. At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. Jesus straightened up and asked her, "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?" "No one, sir," she said. "Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin."
Let us avoid throwing stones. Often when we see sin in other's behaviour we are rather transferring the passions which overwhelm us onto them. We should be slow to accuse others of sinful behaviour and quick to accuse ourselves.
When we say 'I am not judging, I know what is right' then we cannot avoid judging. We do not know the hearts of other people. We have enough trouble understanding our own. It is surely enough to say 'Be careful, these things can lead to sin'. The greatest of all the virtues is humility, and this requires us to have a keen sense of our own sin and to be blind to the sin of others. We will never be wrong if we urge brothers and sisters to speak to their own father of confession.
May the Lord bless our desire for holiness
Father Peter
I'm currently dating a guy and we kiss and hug..what sin am I supposed to confess to my father of confession about this issue? I don't think it's adultery since there are no sexual things going on bw us.
Hi FRA,
Does your conscience tell you that you've done something wrong?
Saint Isaac the Syrian said : First stop talking to give your heart a chance to talk, and then stop your heart from talking so you can give your ears a chance to listen to God.
I think if your conscience is disrupted in ANYWAY - you should not ignore this.
If i were in your shoes, I would tell Abouna what your conscience is telling you. Often, we ignore what our conscience tells us because we ligitimise and justify our acts by saying "well, I'm still a virgin, so doing everything except sex is OK"
This is disasterous.
You actually have much to gain by listening to your conscience - and I'm talking about the relationship with this young man. You'll end up with much more than your bargained for if you follow what your conscience is telling you.
I would stress the utmost in telling your FoC who should be a specialist in the conscience!!
If he's not, then my advice is as follows:
a) If your conscience is disturbing you that you've done something wrong, yet you don't know what it is, then stop doing whatever you are doing until you understand COMPLETELY what is wrong with it. And the understanding will come around by fasting and prayer, and giving yourself a chance to listen to God's words.
b) If your conscience is TOTALLY ok with what you are doing, then great - live by God's commandments that says "Walk in the light" - whatever you do, do it in the open. Tell your parents, tell his parents, be as OPEN about it as you possibly can.
The reaction from your parents and his parents should signal whether you are doing something wrong.
Finally, if I had a daughter, I'd find the guy that kissed her and break his neck. Then I'd find out who his parents are and if I found out they were COPTIC!!! then i'd kick them so hard they'd regret even giving birth to a son. But everyone's different. For me, I'd be so furious that my daughter was in a relationship with a guy that didnt even present himself to me, and it was in the dark. If that was their level of spirituality, then frankly speaking, there's no point in marrying someone coptic. If you are Coptic because you love holiness, then this has nothing in common with holiness and you are just fooling yourself.
Going out for a coffee, with friends, even alone - that's fine. But hugging, kissing, etc... I'd be mad because my daughter will be getting attached to a guy who isnt virtuous enough to have bothered to introduce himself and is doing things in the dark. That would just make me mad.
I just wanted to say that I did not mean to judge anyone. I wanted to judge the situation
Because that is what I believe in. I know that God is with us at all times. If we can see Him with our eyes, can someone kiss his girlfriend in front of God.
I like this verse," Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart." 2 Timothy 2:22 You are right about that Yes and that is what I need
I am sorry FRA if I did not help
Pray for my many weaknesses
thanks
Sorry for posting with a question rather than an answer, but is it important to name a sin?
I've never really explored the question, so you may be on a very good line of thought.
I define sin as any act or intention that is not in accordance with God's will. As such, the only actions and intentions that really need signposts are the ones that point us in the right direction (love, prayer, hinesty, preserverence, etc.). Any other labels are of lower importance; they more or less tell us where it is very important not to go, and they are only useful if we intend to take detours. I realize my definition has a hole in it. Maybe I'll open a discussion about that sometime, but those details don't seem relevant here.
Also, (and Fr Peter, please confirm or correct this) confession isn't telling your FoC a list of sins, it's a healthy conversation and a means of letting go of the things that pull you off course. The things that you confess don't need to be sins at all. It could be in reference to a situation you got yourself into in the best of intentions, or the results of someone else's actions that hurt your faith in some way.
George
Yes, confession is much more than merely listing sins. Indeed the usefulness of the sacrament is barely reached by simply doing that. One could imagine a confession that had no list of sins at all, just a narrative description of how a person was proceeding with their spiritual life based on previous conversations. This would itself root out issues which needed confronting.
Surely sin should be understood as that which prevents us drawing closer to God, which must be the aim of the spiritual life. In that sense we should not focus on sin at all, other than in seeking to remove obstacles to knowing God better. In a conversation with our spiritual fathers we should then find benefit in discussing what we find hard, rather than seeing things in black and white, and in terms of failure and success.
Perhaps I am finding it hard to read some of the Scripture each day. We don't need to find a name for this problem before we describe it. Our spiritual father will help us to see where the problem lies. Is it laziness? Is it because we are allowing worries to take away our sense of peace? Is it just because we don't have a version of the Bible we can understand easily? Our spiritual father will help us to uncover the real reasons. Naming it as the sin of not reading the Bible tends to reduce our spiritual lives to a list of things we have to do. This is far from the reality of our Orthodox Christian life.
If we are honest with our spiritual fathers then they can help us to grow up in Christ, which is a part of their ministry. It demands a relationship with a person, not adherence to a list of rules. The rules are there to be applied by our spiritual fathers as they see fit in our particular circumstances. When we try to apply them ourselves, or worse, when we try to apply them to others, then we generally tend to end up making all manner of mistakes. Perhaps one person is encouraged to fast to a particular time of day and perhaps another is instructed to break their fast later or earlier. If we just have a list of rules then we will often say that so-and-so is slack or lacks commitment because we only see the outward appearance. Yet the spiritual father sees the heart and knows how to apply the spiritual medicine of the Church. The medicine that heals one person in one situation might cause harm to another. Which is why it is best left to a persons spiritual father.
It is clear from the forums here that many Coptic youth face many of the same issues which tend to reflect the interaction of the Coptic culture with the modern Western and secular one. It is encouraging to see so many with a desire for holiness, and others who wish to address imbalances and mistakes which they have made or are making. My only concern is that many of these issues are best addressed in the relationship of a person with their spiritual father, and that when the question is asked publically - is this a sin? - it seems to me that any and every answer is wrong in some sense. Either we condemn one who should not be condemned, or we condone the actions of someone who should not be condoned. This is where the spiritual father knows best. He can ask the questions which should not be asked here. He can see the body language of his spiritual child. He already knows the person.
This is not to say that the questions should not be asked here, but to counsel a certain hesitancy in making blanket statements. And to suggest that listing sins is not a profitable way forward for any of us. Those sins which we miss are often the most damaging to us. The pride, the anger, the selfishness, the selfcentredness. It is relatively easy to not drink, not smoke, not hang out with girls/boys, be in Church a lot, even know lots of hymns. But our spiritual fathers help us go beyond all the good things we do and the bad things we avoid and discover the real issues in our lives. A lot of that is invisible on the internet, where sometimes those who do bad things and stupid things are perhaps more aware of their sin, more humble, less proud, even closer to God.
In Christ
Father Peter
so ask yourself how is dating helpful for me? what am I gaining from this relationship?
Pray for me
Worst Sinner
I think it's not a sin in itself but it's a road to sin..i don't know..this is my own conclusion about it. Any other views are welcome to reply to my question.
That's brilliant. I really love your conclusion. Now that you know it is the road to sin, how do u get off it?
What can you do in your power to change it into a road to righteousness and integrity?
If u know that it is the road to sin, and you do not act on this, that will lead to 2 sins:
a) The sin itself (which is most likely lust)
b) The sin of pride (where you deceive yourself in thinking that you are above being tempted to even sin.
God bless
I still think the focus ought to be on what a person should be doing rather than avoiding what they shouldn't do.
Perhaps a simpler illustration of what I mean is the difference between telling the truth, not telling the truth, and lying. Everyone knows we shouldn't lie, but many of us think it's ok to intentionally leave out key bits of truth because "it wasn't a lie (exactly)".
I think the answer here will come from answering the question "What should you do?", rather than "What should you not do?".
I'm pretty sure you're not kissing this guy because you don't care about him. So could the right answer possibly be to figure out how to get away from him? (I kind of doubt it) I think the question to ask is, "what are the right things to do to love him properly?". Should you love him as a brother, or a future husband? In either case, abstinence is a good idea.
George
[quote author=FRA link=topic=7688.msg100653#msg100653 date=1236017748]
I still don't understand...what sin is this called if it is a sin?
The sin? It's called lust.
[quote author=FRA link=topic=7688.msg100662#msg100662 date=1236030402]
I think it's not a sin in itself but it's a road to sin..i don't know..this is my own conclusion about it. Any other views are welcome to reply to my question.
Contrary to what most people may think... there's little gray in the Bible. That's my opinion anyway. Sure there are discussions that can go on forever with no conclusion. But for the most part, it's rather simple... black and white.
Road to sin? Roads to sin are just as much sin as the sin the road leads to.
Christianity is not about doing no wrong - that's the Jewish law that was ... renewed by Jesus Christ. Now, it's more about doing good.
Romans 12:21 - Do not be overcome with evil, but overcome evil with good.
So, rather than trying to figure out if something is bad... ask yourself if it is good.
QT - careful about the conscience thing... Conscience can be quite adaptive.
Yes, it can!!!! You are so right.
But, I stressed that we should be careful in not hushing out what our consciences are telling us. We should listen very carefully. As you can see from thread, the poster's comments indicate that there IS in fact something on her conscience.
I am therefore stressing that she should not brush it off as a malfunction of her being, but rather listen to it, and deal with it through spiritual councelling with her FoC to see what is bothering it.
She should be praised even for raising that she feels that this is a sin. This is quite rare. Don't u think??
Who nowadays would commit a sin like fornication (as an example!) - and turn and say "I feel that my conscience is telling me that what i have done is wrong"????
And as you said, people's conscioussses are highly adaptive. They are selective in what they feel bad about. In fact, I don't believe that they feel "bad" about anything.. they only feel bad when their soul gets hurt of offended by the actions of sinful behaviour.
I'm glad we are fasting: it truley teaches us that although I can eat everything, not everything is beneficial for me.