help me please

edited December 1969 in Personal Issues
there is this girl and we were best friends and i had feelings for her and she loved me dearly true love but i messed up and now she is out of my life she is such a good girl and i always put my needs to the side to satasfy her needs and always was there for her but what i did was say mean things so she went to her foc and he told her to stay away from me, what should i do i want her back we were such good friends then it just went down hill.. me and her loved each other we were friends and building for the future.
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Comments

  • well i think u should go to her and apologize to her...and it obv seems that u are very serious about this girl....how old are you and you said building for the future and if said what ur age is it would help me giving advice that can help u

    God Bless and pray 4 me
    Copticdeacon
  • Every friendship goes through a difficult phase...we can't help that as it is our human nature, but remember the role of love! If you said some mean things to her, then I can understand why she might be upset...and you should understand why she is upset too. Firstly, I would seek advice from your confession father, and seek forgiveness from God first and foremost. Next, I would suggest that you seek your friend's forgiveness and explain to her that you want to continue your friendship.

    I'm really sorry if this seems unhelpful, but I don't know the exact situation that you're in...it's very hard to try and help and I know I'm not very good at this, but you are in my prayers and I'm sure that everything will be ok :)
    Like I said, every relationship sees turbulance every now and then, but these falls usually serve to strengthen the friendship in the future.

    Matthew
  • oh ok so your around the age to start building things for the future i really think you should apologize and if you love her so much why did you say mean things to her?
  • because we use to be so close and she had so much to tell me in her so i though i can lighta fire under her to say what she had to say nd i made  a mistake its not her fault she dont know how to exprees herself
  • what did you want her to say? like how she feels about you or like her daily problems and stuff going on in her life
  • well both because acouple of months ago like 7 or 8 months ago she stopped talking to me for 3 months cause i sort of had sexual intercouse with her friend and i regret that so much. why would she stop talking to me if me and her are not going out.  i just dont know anymore and she lied to me about hanging out she told me yes we will hang out this day then she says oh no i cant today i am tired then i find out she is hanging out at her friends house and i fought with her after that why would she lie to me about that..thats the negitives.the positives is she cares so much and for her to say this is alot for her to say because she has a hard time expresing herself she told me no other girl can love me like her.
  • well i think shes mostly angry at u b/c u had sex w/ her friend and u said u were building for the future... 1st off i think that u should have had sex at all and u aknowledge that it was wrong which is good and u need to confess that...and if ur building for the future that means ur talking about marriage w/ this girl so obv she wants u to be commited to her...and its her FRIEND so she may think tht u were only getting close to her so u can have intercourse w/ her friend so she may feel used maybe...and from ur other posts on the website it seems that u r not baptized in the coptic church right?....and this girl is she in the coptic church? or something else?
  • yes i am not baptised yet.. and  she is  apart of the coptic church.the sex issue was 7 or 8 months ago now it is about me being mean and angry.. i love this girl so much. but why wont she admit anything then ? i am so confused now ..she told me she would give me that she would give me the chance in the future and i know she loves me and now i dont know i hope she dont hate  me i am so stressed and sacared to lose her forever
  • Explain "about me being mean and angry". What specific issue brought about those words?
  • because i am so sad that it took a turn for the worst which led to this this is why i am so stupied
  • So she has forgave & forgotten about the You having sex?...if she has then it would be that ur being mean to her...Have u taken any step at all to apologize to her?
  • i tried and her brother told me just give it time till i am baptised also abouna told her to get me out of her life
  • her brother is right just give it time plus it depends what she told abouna about you...like if she told him about the sex thing i would think that abouna would say to get away from you..so maybe you should talk to abouna
  • no she did not tell him about that sex situation at all. i just regret what i have done because the more i think about it the more i relize she was open with her words and actions..i just hope i still recive the chance because with us it is true love..her brother told me a while ago that i can see you and my sister havin a family togther.and that he would rather have me then anyone else be with her
  • well its good that u have family approval lol...but idk what would make abouna make say to her to stay away maybe its because she feels that she its still not the right time to get really close to a guy right idk its more of a thing where u 2 should be mature, sit down and talk about it
  • yes hopefully on the day of baptisem it will happen.
  • and pray for it and we are in a fast now so pray w/ your heart and ask God to guide you in the right path and pray for his will and ask Virign St. Mary to pray on your behalf and H.H. Pope Kyrillos...what are u converting from?
  • i am converting from being a muslim.. its hard enough just trying to convery. and the other situations on top of it it gets so unbarable at time
  • oh wow thats amazing i think that people who convert from islam def have blessing...i think that people who convert are more spiritual then people who are born into Christianity because people who convert they realize how true and amazing Christianity and God is def w/ u and will choose you the right path and if she is the one then God will lead you to her or maybe God has someone 10 times better then her

    God Bless and Pray 4 me Hope i helped you
    Copticdeacon
  • thank you so much i am trying to convince abona that i am ready for baptisem i am getting very impatient
  • well how long have you been learning the Church rules and Dogmas?
  • here is the thing i have known mostly everything about the religen from a young age because i know so many people from the curch i grew up with alot of people from chruch so i know bassically everything and have been trying to convert from september 2006 but i have wanted to be christian since a young age. i went to 1 abona for about 6 months then he went to egypt then i have been going to this abona since 14 months ago i really want to be christian
  • which country are you originally from?

    God Bless
  • i am from egypt born here in america and i am from jersey city new jersey and st george st shanouda church is right in the heart of a heavly populated muslim area
  • yea it is Im from CT not that far from NJ....abouna def has a sepcial reason to why he's not letting you be baptized right now...he always has the best intrest for everyone
  • what do you think the reason can be?
  • well i want to say that maybe he wants you to grow spiritually because you can know everything about the church like all the rules and dogmas and how things work but maybe he wants your spirituallty and faith to grow more but idk what the exact situation is.
  • i understand that but i have my whole life to grow spirtually i mean yes i know anyone can die at anytime buti have worked so hard to try to become christan since september of 06. i have went through hell honestly im sorry for the laungauge.but it is so hard i am so empty inside
  • bigee, i read whole your topic. i dont understand little bit your situation. are you converting to coptic bc you want to or bc of this girl?how you could do something with another girl, friend of her while you are as you said in love with someone else?were the girl also coptic?i can imagine that the priest really want to know that you are ready and with all your heart wants to be christian. i think you know that converting from muslim is not easy...does your family knows?what you are planning after you will be baptised?
    God Bless
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