+ I am not used to confessing very serious stuff. I somtimes get embarassed to confess the really bad sins just because everyody thinks i am good and stuff (which i am not). I even get embarassed to confess as I am a deacon and don't want abouna to think bad of me. What shall I do?
+ Now I have two very very big sins that i need to confess. On one hand i get embaressed but on the other hand I feel guilty because I have confessed all my other little sins and l left the big ones out. It also kills me to have the communion every week and even aproach the communion. I have already repented for these sins and have tried to stop them completely but i still need to confess so that my sins are completely wiped.
+ I somtimes think of writing down all these sins so later on (in 5 years) I can confess them [so that they wont have a big impact] but what if somthing happens to me before then.
+ I know that abounas can't tell your confession to anyone or change his opinion about anyone but I still feel that.
+ The other point is acctually explaining what I did. They are so bad and i don't even know how to explain them. These sins are common among teens and youths and are bad habbits. What shall I do?
+ I am young so for my age it is a big sin. But still how do I say it to abouna?
Please help me and pray for me a lot because i am ineed of these prayers
Comments
It is completely natural to feel embarrased by your sins, and in a way it is good, because it shows that you are sorry you did them i.e. it makes your confession complete. Before you confess, you should sit with yourself for 10 mins or so, remebering your sins so that you can say them to abouna, so that they are forgiven. Don't worry, we all sin and all have to confess - it is one of God's great mercies that he allows us to confess as many times as we need. As for the embarrasment part, and you being worried about abouna thinking badly of you remember two things: abouna will not treat you differently or look at you in a bad light, because we are all sinners. Your confession is also in complete confidentiality - abouna will not tell anyone else what you have told him. And sometimes it helps to think of it this way - would you rather your sins were uncovered in front of abouna (and God), in secrecy and who you know loves you and won't tell, or in front of the whole world, those who are dead and living, and those who will live, in front of the angels and saints and in front of God of course on the Last Day?
pray for me
joe
Lost, abona won't think you are a bad person. He will think you are great becuase you have the courage to confess to sins you have done. And since you are a deacon, I am sure you are going to feel even worse if you don't confess because you take communion.
When i confess, i usually look to the floor and say all what i want to say then look to abona and see what he is going to say! :) helps alot!
bentBABAyasooa`
I think I know exactly which two sins you are suffering from.
+ One of them is watching bad movies on the net.
+ The other one is a bodily issues.
========correct me if I am wrong==========
Now u asked about explaining them because u can't say anything cause it might be stressing to u.
+ Ok the first one is easy to explain. Just say that u have been watching unsuitable vids on the internet. Abouna will hopefully understand without u having to go into greater detail.
+ I am not sure how to say the second one. Does anybody have any ideas ?
Pray 4 me
+ First. Thank u Kirmich for clarifing this issue and giving me soecific instructions on what to say.
+ Kirmich is acctually right. I was trying to hint it so that someone would acctually understand it and help me evenmore. I appreciate him and don't find it offencive at all otherwise I wouldn't have hinted it at all. He acctually gave me a lot of help.
+ And please everybody, can we speak directly so that I can get enought help. I again stress that I am not offended at all (otherwise i wouldn't have made this topic). Kirmich clarified this issue even more inorder to explain it to all of u. He is a friend and he knows about it so he isn't being mean by just doing it to a complete stranger.
Thanks
Pray 4 me
Here is my advice.
Probably confessing that you masturbated to a priest is really hard. Also going to bad websites. Masturbation once started becomes pretty much a habit. I don't really have any advice on how to stop it. I think going to bad websites is easier to stop than masterbation. Every time you want to do one of these things, you need to pull out your agpeya and read some psalms. The thoughts of these wicked sins usually come when a person is bored and doesn't know what to do. That is why the angel appeared to St. Anthony and showed him to weave palm leaves into baskets. That would take away his thoughts of boredom. Even reading an interesting book not nesecarily a spiritual book can keep you busy. Do housework or even watching tv (as long as it's a clean show) can help. Play videogames (like all other guys), buy yourself an xbox 360 and halo 3 or call of duty and start playing. Really anything you enjoy doing. When it's time to confess to abouna, just remember that probably other people in your church have done the same thing since it such a common issue. Abouna is not going to be like, oh i have to tell your mom and dad or you can't be a deacon anymore. He won't care. Abouna Yostos being a saint never paid attention to people's confessions, he just gave them absolution in the end. People thought he was listening to them but in reality, he wasn't. Although most priests don't do that, just remember that Abouna is not there to judge you, he's there as a witness that you confessed and through the Holy Spirit, he gives you advice.
To be honest with you lost, I don't think anyone can blame you for what you did. The environment nowadays is so sinful that unless you don't leave your home, it's almost impossible not to sin or lust. Even when i'm on the computer looking for things i need for a school project, there will be things that start to get me thinking bad thoughts. It's ridiculous. I'm sittin here looking for information on a new product i want from bestbuy and at the side of the page there is advertisements for inappropriate things that start to get my mind into a bad state.
I'll try to confess next tuesday if i get the chance. Do u know how this all started? I was on my computer doing homework then i got bored and started playing games on some sites. As you mentioned some sites support others so on the side there were these links to bad sites. That was how it started. Also it started on another time by me looking for some particular images on google. It was somthing so innocent but the search results were so uninnocent. Anyway all of that happened over a year ago and now i have completely stopped. As Kirmich said before that it is easier to confess that u have gone on bad sites. You have also mentioned that it is very hard to go up to abouna and say that u have masturbated. It is impossible. That was why I needed help in the first place so that someone can tell me exactly what to say maybe someone who has been through it all and knows what it is like. Before I also thought that I was the only one who commited this sin but know i know that many poeple do it and it is common which makes me feel a bit better. Anyway, I am not denying that it wasn't my fault but it is so hard with all these sites. I also stopped them by getting a few games at one time so i was spending time trying to finish them.
Anyway pray 4 me
+ The thing is, I am not embarassed to discuss it here because nobody knows me (or at least most of you) but I am embarassed infront of abouna who has always been my Father in confession. Who knows me very personally not only as a priest of the church alone.
I am curious to know,if you did go to confession. Remember, heaven is full of people who started over again ( I think an Irish saying).
Do not forget that you have to take full responsibility of sins that you committed.Do not shift the blame to websites and links or anything similar.It is only when we fully accept the full responsibility of our actions that our repentance is genuine. Adam blamed Eve for his sin,but that did not spare him the explusion from Paradise.
For the part that is understandably embarrassing, you could perhaps be a little bit diplomatic and say "Dwelt on inappropriate adult videos" and for the lust part "committed unworthy actions alone". Abouna is smart and will catch it while it is in your lips.Unless Abouna asks for clarification, it is not necessary to go into details or be so explicit about some details. So go ahead. Better to confess for 2 minutes than to spend in hell for eternity.
I encourage you to not watch t.v, play games, sit at home all day....believe it or not, all these things can help enhance some of these urges. The best advice i can give you, other than seeing your father of confession, is to keep yourself busy-and when i say busy, i mean PRODUCTIVE busy! Do your homework and focus on your education, and in your spare time you can learn a hymn, do some housework, play a sport, or go hang out with your friends. It is what you do with your time, believe me!!! Of course you should also pray, fast, and read the Holy Bible throughout. By disciplining yourself, you will be able to fight off the urges of temptation, thereby making you victorious in your battles against satan. Please do listen to what i am saying to you!!!
GB
Tony
God blees you and please pray for me the sinner,
I am curious to know,if you did go to confession.
Unfortunatly no. It wasn't because I was scared but because there were other problems and I didn't get a chance. Keep praying for me though that I may get the earliest chance possible.
1 Corinthians 9:27
But I discipline my body and bring it into subjection, lest, when I have preached to others, I myself should become disqualified.
Discipline yourself, pray a lot, pray for God's forgiveness, feel true regret and sorrow, and then get the absolution from abouna. The feeling after confession is beyond description - how relieved you feel, as if a great weight has been lifted off your shoulders
pray for me
joe
It's ok lost, but you must confess soon
Yeah I realised that because temptations are increasing however it is the holy lent which gives me a chance to repent and fight it. I still don't know when I will confess as my father in confession isn't close.
+ I am young so for my age it is a big sin. But still how do I say it to abouna?
As my sunday school teacher told me...Abouna hasn't been living under a rock (if u know what i mean *non-offencive way).
Abouna knows about all these sins... he knows we r human amd that that stuff happens...
Go confess...and
p.s. Abouna wont judge u..he shouldn't cjange the way he treats u..cause u confesed and if he dosn't than that defeats the whole purpose of being a priest
Also I would like to add, do not forget that others did worst than you. Look as Moses the Black. He did every concievable bad thing. Killing, stealing, cursing, and adultery and that is only the beginning. However, he changed his ways and became a monk. Also St Mary of Egypt, she sold her body to be able to go to the church in Jerusalem. However when she was not able to enter the church, she also changed her ways and gave herself to the lord.
Well moses the black was a sinner... that was..expected.. from him...but we were born in chritian familleis and have higher expectations..if u kniw what i mean.
Well moses the black was a sinner... that was..expected.. from him...but we were born in chritian familleis and have higher expectations..if u kniw what i mean.
Yeah thats right! That is why it is embarassing (especialy if your family is very religious, they have raised you to love God+Church and you are a deacon).
+ On the other hand St Mary of Egypt was born in a christian family yet she sold her body day after day after day.
Pray for me